The wife and I got misled (from my perspective) into heading down to Calgary to attend a great “leadership” event that was 3 days long. While I asked the lovely wife to provide me a description of the event or an itinerary of speakers I didn’t really push it and the wife kept insisting it was going to be great and a good step in her career path of becoming a holistic worker. We’ve attend past great events (the seed event) so part of me was hoping this mysterious event would be good. I eventually acquiesced and we loaded up the car, booked some very costly hotel rooms and headed down to cowtown.

I’m going to have an entire other post dedicated to how expensive hotel rooms are…and how uncomfortable they are to stay in….

At the hotel I looked around during the shitty continental breakfast and was sure there was a Mormon convention in town, everyone wearing stark black illfitting suits with small backpacks and smiling at you in that unsettling manner. At this point I started to get a bit nervous as I was starting to suspect that these people might be attending the leadership event. One cereal eater casually turned to me and said the Bible had plenty to teach women about patience before returning back to poking the toaster with a plastic fork to free her trapped bagel.

Janelle was still optimistic and in her business casual attire we hopped on the LRT and popped out a few minutes later at the Stadium. A girl named Yvonne we friend’d on the train bubbled about how the previous nights speeches had been so inspirational and we would love today. Her comments were “I never knew you could ask so many questions to find things out about friends and family”.

We got there…sat in the huge stadium full of people wearing those same illfitting suits (since when does business casual include a tie?)

The lights went down……a huge drum roll….strobe lights..a smoke bomb….a throng of people rushed the stage……..shrills cry’s of excitement rise up to fill the arena….am I at a…I dunno…beiber concert? ┬áNope…out runs out some crazy dudes and hi-fives fly around the room and then BAM.


Serious? I got roped into a 3day amway selling convention? what.the.fuck. (pardon the profanity in this post but I’m still pretty pissed) I’m a freaking self identified minimalist who has worn the same toque for 30 years..I cut my hair with a bread knife……I’m almost a dang hobo….but with a corporate slant

Listen…I don’t mind selling…or people selling things..when my friend calls me up and goes “hey buddy, we got a new kind of olive oil in we think you’d enjoy” or “Hey, last minute deal on a trip to cuba”….I don’t mind…cause you know what….they are being upfront at least in offering you something…

Amway…Quixstar….Primerica….Norwex…Passion Parties…are all pyramid scams….yes…legal…legal pyramid scams…and I realize they all make good products…I really do…I have no doubt most of their products are solid….but their focus is on recruiting and intruding into the lives of those close to you…that’s a big freaking intrusion…

If you feel that you can only get a “friend” to show up to an event by excluding certain details (or downright deceiving you) then maybe it shouldn’t be an event you should be promoting to them…

I realize that a lot of the aforementioned pyramid scams have a huge amount of very loyal followers who would likely tear me apart for saying anything negative (if anyone read this blog) and that’s to be expected…most of them use very cult like behaviour and practices to encourage those types of people to join up. When I was looking around that arena full of people freaking out I felt totally terrified I would get exposed and ripped apart so I stood up and screamed “I LOVE YOU, YOU WONDERFUL BASTARD!, GO AMWAY!!”

*at this point I should point out I take some artistic licence with my posts.

But I can tell you this….look at the statistics and don’t get sucked along if you want to get involved in one of those organizations…Most people involved in them do not make money…that is an absolute fact…and you know what…I think most people that get involved in these things can do great things….you have motivation already! inside of you! it’s easy to take the route of going to an arena and pee’ing your pants over false idols but take a little bit more time to develop your own business if you want to do something great. Find out what gets you excited about them and do it yourself!

That’s all…I wasn’t sure exactly where this post is going when I started it but you know…I think it ended up slightly more positive than I expected…cause I’m thinking of all the people who have approached me about these types of things and I think most had a strong will to succeed and do great things….. these are people who I would consider to be “influencers and motivators”….there are so many great ways that you can impact and be useful to someone else’s life (and frankly make a bit of monies too) . To use a saying I hate….”think outside the box” and stop looking for your motivation and success in nicely pre-packaged books and seminars.

And with that….down from my soap box I go… a few hundred dollars and a weekend shorter…but perhaps a bit wiser?

**For the record Janelle and I still had a decent time…visited a bunch of markets…drank too much by the pool and ran into some old friends of mine…..just wish the whole weekend had started off a bit differently.